It’s been a few days since I’ve been waking up and doing the same thing.

Each day in the morning I wake up at 4.30 am and then I meditate. When I began I could barely sit for 5-10 minutes. I was so anxious.

Now, while I am still anxious, I am able to sit for almost an hour. I am a lot less anxious than when I started out, and I started out 22 days ago.

Before I talk about how I formed this habit, I want to talk about the nature of anxiety and how it affects you.

My thoughts used to feel like they were cramped. I felt that I was being squeezed into a corner and not allowed to move away. I felt cornered, controlled by the invisible forces inside me that seemed to be guiding my actions.

I would scream, shout, say mean things, and then wake up moments later to ask myself, “Why would I say that?”

But a few moments later I let that rage and pain sweep over me again, and again I would do things I was not so proud of.

I need to change, I said, I need to change something. I need to take better actions! And yet those actions never seemed to happen.

I decided to just focus on showing up for meditation. And I told myself that I would only need to do it for 2 minutes to be a success.

But here’s the real challenge.

I need to show up for a full year. Twice a day. For 2 minutes.

There have been days where I have just sat and done meditation for 2 minutes, and yes, it sucked to only be able to sit still for 2 minutes!

But I felt better about myself for doing it. I felt great that I could just do what I committed to. Even if it was only for 2 minutes.

The plan is to learn how to SHOW UP.

Showing up itself is a habit that sometimes people forget is the main reason that things happen.

Think about it. There was/is something you want(ed) to do. What happened to it? Maybe you showed up for a few days, for a few weeks…and then you just decided to quit.

Maybe it didn’t feel important anymore? You told yourself it isn’t that important. Perhaps the ideas that got you excited seemed too far fetched and too big to ever see the light of the day?

Well, before you start running you gotta walk. And before you walk you need to crawl.

You know this, even showing up is fighting against your old habits and instincts that scream at you that it isn’t you. That you aren’t what you are trying to show the world you are.

But eventually, you get there. You do.

I have started to achieve some results. I achieved some in the past.

I am hoping that I can do the same again.

And I hope that you start showing up. If you just show up, you will figure out what the next steps are.